Stacks of superconducting tapes can trap much higher magnetic fields than conventional magnets. This makes them very promising for motors and generators. However, ripple magnetic fields in these machines present a cross-field component that demagnetizes the stacks. At present, there is no quantitative agreement between measurements and modeling of cross-field demagnetization, mainly due to the need of a 3D model that takes the end effects and real micron-thick superconducting layer into account. This article presents 3D modeling and measurements of cross-field demagnetization in stacks of up to 5 tapes and initial magnetization modeling of stacks of up to 15 tapes. 3D modeling of the cross-field demagnetization explicitly shows that the critical current density, $Jc$, in the direction perpendicular to the tape surface does not play a role in cross-field demagnetization. When taking the measured anisotropic magnetic field dependence of $Jc$ into account, 3D calculations agree with measurements with less than 4 % deviation, while the error of 2D modeling is much higher. Then, our 3D numerical methods can realistically predict cross-field demagnetization. Due to the force-free configuration of part of the current density, J, in the stack, better agreement with experiments will probably require measuring the Jc anisotropy for the whole solid angle range, including $J$ parallel to the magnetic field.